Solidarity one day, triggered the next

A quick update on the previous posts subject then I’ll go on to a much delayed general update. So yeah, that situation happened on the Weds (2 weeks ago). Thursday I gave my apology to the group although some didn’t think it was necessary. The facilitator of that group wanted to process it and brought […]

Anorexic behavior; will there be an end?

Okay, first of all I know I’ve been remiss in being here… no apologies. I apologize for what seems like everything. Life keeps reminding me that I am a human being like everyone else and therefore simply unable to show up for everything all the time. It really is a bother, not showing up that […]

Compliance/Noncompliance, day by day

I feel like its been ages since I’ve updated! IOP was canceled Monday so I didn’t get a chance to write. Yes, I could turn on my computer at home but I’ve gotten into the habit of writing before iOP at the cafe. When I was in college I studied in coffee shops; I wonder […]

Being a bother, plain and simple

The two things I think I said the most when I was in the treatment program was, “I’m sorry,” and, “I don’t want to be a bother.” You see, I feel like I’m a bother to everyone, to life in general if you want to know. I feel like I’m an inconvenience, that I take […]

Forward & back in recovery

Questions: When did I start perceiving my body as the enemy? When did I objectify it and decide that it was something to be brought in line, tamed, punished, manipulated to look like something different than it was designed to look? When did I decide that it was better to simply not eat anymore? How […]

7 ½ hrs, holy crap!

Yes, you heard it… 7 ½ hrs! What am I talking about you ask? Sleep of course! I’ve been periodically getting more and more sleep (thank you med change) but this was shocking. However, this works out well with my plan today. Detour that will come back to my plans… Before I went into Sol […]